Dodgy Film Club: Season of the Witch

A meeting of two actors who seem to have trouble turning down work! Nicolas Cage and Ron Perlman are Crusade knights, who are tasked with escorting a ***SPOILER ALERT*** witch demon to a trial by monks. Oh and the witch demon is possibly responsible for the plague.



This was added to our watchlist as it featured on How Did This Get Made? and I may have a bone to pick with the good podcasting folks. Admittedly, they saw it upon its release, but this film doesn't even work as a bad horror movie. Don't get me wrong, it is bad. Highlights include

• Fluctuating accents 
• Historical and cultural inaccuracies
• Ron Perlman playing himself!
• Nic Cage in a glorious wig
• Phrases like 'let's get the hell out of here' and 'shit'..in Crusade times..
• Bad CGI
• Wolves werewolves vampire wolves? with an apparent death wish

Some good old fashioned Crusade-era banter. And hair.

So basically the Church sent these guys to kill all the non believers. Nic Cage is fine with this until he kills some woman and he is suddenly hit with righteous remorse. Nic and Ron leave the army, only to be eventually captured and held in a cell. They then agree to transport the 'girl' (witch/demon) to her trial by monks. There's a demon (satan?) involved, who looks like something out of Doom and sounds like a pantomime villain. In the end religion wins and the plague goes away. Yeah...

On the plus side, Claire Foy, who plays the oddly attractive Adorabelle Dearheart in Going Postal, is 'the girl' and by gods there is just something about her in this too.