Sum 41, Billy Talent and more, Vancouver, March 14, 2013

From the moment Deryck Whibley hits the stage, it is clear the diminutive Sum 41 singer has not aged well. But more on that later.

Taking our seats in the old person section, we did not have long to wait for this hockey arena show to kick off. And the time we had was filled with the running, slack-jawed commentary of two Canadian rednecks who were in the row behind us, every word coated in pot smoke.

Indian Handcrafts

Like an ugly, 'warts and all' music documentary at the Oscars, Indian Handcrafts both surprise and merit smatterings of applause, but really they are just tolerated rather than appreciated. Which is a shame as their slightly psychotic blend of blues, doom, hardcore, shrieks and indie was quite fun to behold. Never the type of music I would listen to at home, but good live music for a certain period of time regardless.

Hollerado

That guy...

More on par for the night these fresh faced guys have parent-and-teen-friendly good vibes as they cliche their way through some indie poprock.  It wasn't my thing but I can understand why the kidz might like it, especially if they have never seen an arena show before. The singer had a bit of That Guy going on, but hopefully the incident at the end of their set will make him reconsider his stage presence. In a preplanned move, the song built to an ending where he rebelliously launched his guitar a whole 4 feet in the air and caught it with the final cymbal crash. Pretty cool, eh? Unfortunately he caught it WITH HIS FACE, which caused the redneck to hoot and holler, and caused quite a bit of bleeding also I imagine. Still, chalk it down as a lesson learned.

Sum 41

Avert your eyes, children!

And so with little or no waiting around Sum 41 blaze into The Hell Song and damn, they are good live! I missed my chance to see them 8 or so years ago when they played Ireland and then they pulled out of a tour a year or so ago. The sound is impeccable, a wall of noise that is complemented by a sweet light show but there is something distracting that is gnawing away at my pure, unadulterated enjoyment of the moment.

What is it? Oh yes; the singer has a fat face so he looks like the novelty 'blow up head' part of New Found Glory 'My Friends Over You' video (1.26), topped with 'older lady trying to look younger' messy, crimson hair. This, coupled with his extremely camp onstage demeanor, and a speaking voice that sounds like the aural representation of a pubescent child with lung cancer, means the whole effect is that of an elderly drag queen who is influenced by anime. So in between killing it with a whole backpack full of hits, we were treated to the odd spectacle of Deryck c 2013.

Not that it took anything away from the performance. I was actually the happiest I've been at a gig of this sort in a very long time. It is not often that you can see a band a decade too late and still really enjoy the set. Of course they did ham it up, with Arena Rock fan interaction parts in every second song, but that was counterbalanced by them bringing up some kids on stage for most of the set and, well, sounding pretty damn good.

Billy Talent

I've always meant to listen to Billy Talent a bit more, I've never heard a song of their that I didn't like and I've actually known them for a long time, maybe 10 years or so. This tour seems to be a BIG DEAL to them as they're doing coast to coast of Canadia, playing arenas, using big screens, nice looking sets and recording the whole thing. They took about 2 months to set up, with a huge curtain covering the activity behind. Then, the guitarist with the weird hair and the singer with the weird hair started the set by themselves IN FRONT OF THE CURTAIN. It did of course drop as the band kicked into the song and everyone cheered but I dunno, seems like they're still figuring the process out!

Five songs in, it becomes clear that I don't know a lot of BT songs and after a good opening, I'm beginning to lose a little interest. But hey, I'm getting old and I had work that day... This isn't really a discredit to the band, they gave it their all and I was kept entertained by the cool camera that was in the mic stand and gave really unique shots of the action. The band deserve major props for staying together for 20 years and I'm pretty sure they started in their mid teens, which makes it even more impressive. The fans seemed suitably whipped up into a frenzy and there was barely a note out of place during the entire set.

Again, it was a case of DAT VOICE in between songs and during the screechier parts of his range. But it is unique vocal experience and one that has gotten BT to where they are today, so who am I to judge, except a slightly cynical music lover with slightly damaged eardrums.

Ridiculous Metal of the Month: Bloodbound - In The Name of Metal

I don't actually listen to metal these days. Not 'proper' metal anyway, just stuff with breakdowns played by lads with emo fringes. The only REAL METAL I enjoy in any way is the completely ludicrous, over the top, so into it that it's a parody of itself, MEEETAAAAAAAAAL.

There was a time when I'd try to get into the supposedly more credible genres such as metal and pop punk would be a guilty pleasure from my younger years. These days I am unashamedly representing my pop punk roots but I occasionally relapse into a metal fix. Thankfully these moments are few and far between and when they do happen I am clearheaded enough to see them for the ridiculous, homoerotic lolfactories that they are. So, here is the first installment of Ridiculous Metal of the Month: Bloodbound - In The Name of Metal

So we see the little kid wake up only to be confronted with the genre that every metalhead most despises; Country and Western!! (They also don't like rap too much but will allow it in some situations). Ughhh, country, it's so cheesy and wack. Old music played by dumb hicks with long hair. Not like REAL MUSIC. Not like METAL.

Some things to note:

• Nothing is more metal than screaming metal in a falsetto voice while wearing leather. NOTHING.
• The kid is a great actor and I love that he's nodding his head from the first line and then headbanging out of time and using his air guitar within the opening few seconds, such is the feeling that metal gives him.
• "You say I'm evil, you say I suck. My hair's too long, I don't give a fuck!" And it goes on like this. Is this srs?!
• METAL in flames. Hell yeah!
• The kid knows his stuff. Proper metal bands like Kiss and eh, the Misfits...
• What is the guy in the guitar shop actually doing while he checks the guitar? And why isn't he worried that this child is there alone, buying a guitar that is too big for him, with not even a carrybag or case thrown in? Poor show, sir.
• And so it finally ends, and the kid is on the streets with just a pointy guitar for company.

Some band called Big Fish do an MC Lars cover at their high school talent show

When I saw that a high school band covered 'This Gigantic Robot Kills' by MC Lars with full brass section my ska/dork/troll sense went into overdrive! Then I clicked into the video and immediately knew it was going to exceed all my expectations!

Firstly naming your 3rd wave ska band Big Fish...srsly guyz? (I'm assuming they're a ska band..even so performing a ska cover with that name is damning evidence) What were the other suggestions you came up with while scribbling logos on your diary in maths class, More Than Jake? The Sublime Specials? And more importantly, are Reel Big Fish now the inspiration to a new generation of garage ska bands? Don't get me wrong, Sell Out was a tune (IN 1998) and Beer is my jam but even so..I'm not sure I want to live in a world where kids look up to RBF.

Then the video itself is a production line of Teenage Garage Band lols.

• Practice/Combo amps!
• The singer is the best example of a 'that guyyyy' that I've seen in quite a while. Yo brah, Saved by the Bell want their look back! Wanted him to be more of a douche but even so.
• You can't see the drummer properly thanks to that guyyyy
• Dem chorus vox..jello biafra much?
• Dat solo...
• Those hilarrriiious sunglasses..
• The fact that the bassist wears regular glasses. OMGoth. I feel your pain dude. But on the plus side when you look back on this you'll look slightly less like a douchebag.

Lettuce be srs though, I'd be delighted to have access to a brass section and 6 other dudes who know MC Lars now, nevermind in my teens. And they get cheers at the end so maybe they won't get beat up, and some of them might even get the girl.

Some lad does a Wonder Years vocal cover in his basement

While I admire the fact this guy likes both Slipknot and The Wonder Years, this isn't the kind of thing you should be putting on the internet as a CV for your vocal skillz. Some points potential bandmates will have to take into consideration..

• His bitchin' stage moves. Monitor/stomp box required.
• The Slipknot t-shirt - is that the 'look' we're going for with this band, guys?
• He does seem to have lots of gear and a relatively sweet basement to jam and drink beer in, though he probably has to wait until his parents are out before he can 'really rock out'
• Does 'attitude' outweigh 'talent' in terms of requirements for a frontman?
• Dem guest vox - No backing vocalists required!
  

Douche Chill Durst: Travel

The Wonder Years - Newcastle o2 Academy 13/9/11

This was the second time I have seen The Wonder Years, and a reliving of an early date with my beure. The trip to the pretty unloveable Newcastle was a birthday present from her, but she wasn't to know that the town would have about as much personality as a stack of shoeboxes. Though it did have a good indoor market and we were only there two days, so maybe we missed out on some areas.

Opening up on the night were Such Gold, who played Galway not too long ago, and Valencia, who I knew lilttle or nothing about.

I've grown to like Such Gold alot since I first heard in the last year. One of the guitarists from No Trigger was filling in for them and i think he actually added to their performance. No one really knew who they were (except two tall American easycore brahs) who blocked my damn view later in the gig. Despite the lack of crowd response the band were impressive, considering the circumstances.
As I said, I knew basically nothing of Valencia before this, but now I know that their basist seems like a douchebag. You know 'that guy' in the teenage metallica cover band..that was him.We've all been there. Non-ironic glam rock moves and trying to get the crowd to clap along with overenthusiastic beating of his ham fists, and all this from a bassist for goths sake. This coupled with his horrific on stage banter

"This reminds me of one episode of Byker Grove where they all went to a rock show..." 

made the bar seem that bit more appealing. In fairness, they have some vaguely likeable pop rock songs, and played a decent cover of Linoleum. But still.

After doing their own soundcheck, which was nice to see, thought they might have people to do that for them at this stage, The Wonder Years launched into Came Out Swinging from their latest album. The sound was so much better than they had on their support slot of the kerrang tour and they seemed happy to be there, despite the slightly muted audience reaction. It was a small crowd but there was a lower level of douchebaggery than there usually is at a 14+ gig. What I noticed this time was the backing vocals, which were pretty spot on with how they sounded on CD, even if the bassist, Josh seemed to be straining sometimes and doing a weird holding his throat thing on some lines. The setlist was solid, avoiding all but one song of their first album, which is a bit of a shame, but understandable. You're not Salinger.. was probably the highlight of the night and I think everyone left happy.

Got to say a quick hello to Josh before the charming security men hassled everyone out of the place. A lot of people seemed to be waiting around for their parents to pick them us. We went to look for a bar.

Oh and, The Wonder Years merch guy was wearing pyjamas. I hope it's not going to become a thing that people do in public, more than it already is. Wouldn't trust it.